Not My Monkey – By Arnie Wohlgemut
The phrase “Not My Circus, Not My Monkey” is a Polish proverb which is still in use today. It is a way of saying, “Don’t drag me into your drama and your issues…”
“If you fuel your journey on the opinions of others you are going to run out of gas.”
Dr. Steve Maraboli
Here is what I learned. Our responses to unpleasant circumstances or issues others identify with, can in some cases, put a monkey on our back.
Ever happen to you?
Let me give you an example. There have been times in my life where I felt unjustly accused of something, and I found myself trying hard to prove that I was not that type of person I was being portrayed to be.
It seemed the more I tried to explain my side of things, the worse it got. I knew what my team and I were capable of, and the vision I had, to transform the organization to be a sector leading team of professionals but somehow, my reputation was challenged, and my confidence took a beating.
It took a while, but I did eventually realize I just put their monkey on my back! I was adapting what others thought and said about me as my reality. Very foolish. Someone’s opinion of you does not have to become your reality, do not let it define you.
“Do not let the limitations they put on you be your insecurities.”
Steven Furtick
We as leaders walk a fine line between being responsible to others and being responsible for others. Sometimes these lines get blurred. When they do, it is often the result of someone’s issues they put on you as a leader.
We have cases to protect our phones, phones that can be repaired or replaced. But they do not make cases to protect your self confidence, your mind, passion, or dreams. Only you can protect these things.
“Thinking is difficult, that is why most people judge.”
Carl Jung
Yes, dealing with people can be messy. They have baggage and it should remain theirs. I agree that we should help them be successful by removing barriers. But not solve their issues for them.
Do not carry other people’s monkey on your back…
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